Topic > The Function of Courtesy in Civil Society

Society functions because it operates according to its own internal rules, mores, customs, taboos and traditions, and to participate in society it is generally necessary to accept these often unspoken norms of conduct and speech. One of the most benign norms is the practice of polite speech. The function of polite speech is twofold; to avoid conflicts with the unfamiliar and ward off boredom. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original Essay Polite speech serves as a universal language among strangers and acquaintances, and this universal polite lexicon sets the norms for how we behave when dealing with the unfamiliar. When meeting someone new, you would probably say something along the lines of "Hi, my name is ___" and then shake their hand. Not doing so could offend them and lead to discord. So not only does polite language prevent conflict, but it is so deeply ingrained in everyone that avoiding it invites conflict. Human communication is a blend of words and body language, and having an agreed-upon way to act in most common scenarios avoids potential friction. For example, when someone is asked "How are you?" or "What's going on?" and they don't mean saying your dog or your mother is dying or something like that, the polite response is "good" or "fine". Why were we taught to say "How are you?" and reply with "well", the words themselves don't mean what they actually mean; to the person who falsely answers “fine,” they are avoiding the embarrassing and somewhat taboo act of emotionally unloading on someone who doesn't have the time or interest to invest in your response. In a sense, speaking politely means sticking to a loose script to navigate life with as little conflict as possible. Polite speech is also a tool to eliminate silence and boredom. When you're stuck in a boring situation with another person or people, polite "small talk" is a great way to break the silence. There's even a term for this: icebreakers, which are phrases and questions that break the "ice" of an awkward silence because they are designed to elicit a response from the other person. People are generally uncomfortable with silence, so we use polite language to distract ourselves by asking simple, polite, boring questions (What do you do? How are you? What's the weather like, right?) not because "We're not interested in their answers, but because it lubricates the wheels of social interaction. People love to talk about themselves and these targeted questions are designed expressly for this purpose. Humans are social animals by nature, talking and interacting with other people makes us feel good and small talk they give us something to say. Ultimately, the act of polite speech is much more about the act itself than the speech. Keep in mind: this is just one example. Get a custom paper from our expert writers now personalized essay because there are generally agreed upon standards of conduct, and increasingly severe penalties for increasingly severe violations of those standards of conduct. Polite speech is a means by which human beings can interact civilly and detachedly in a somewhat manner significant. However, this meaning does not come from the content and intent of the speech, but from the fact that we are speaking to each other politely.