It starts from the moment we understand the words. It comes from parents, siblings, friends, the media and even strangers. It's something we've all dealt with at least once in our lives. It's called body shaming. Body shaming is defined as criticizing oneself or others (intentionally or unintentionally) based on some aspect of physical appearance. This isn't just the difference between who is "fat" and who is "not," but encompasses anything someone can say about another person's appearance, whether that's saying something about their race, their face or on his body. Body shaming occurs in many cases. different ways. It occurs by criticizing one's appearance, through judgment or comparison with another person, criticizing the appearance of another in front of him and criticizing the appearance of another without his knowledge. No matter how it manifests, it leads to comparison and hurt feelings, and perpetuates the idea that people should be judged primarily by their physical characteristics. The sad truth about this type of negativity is that it is everywhere. It appears in magazine headlines advertising advice on how to lose weight “in a few days,” look thinner “instantly,” and how to hide our “imperfections.” It exists in movies. It exists in your mother's offhand comment that "you need to get in shape." It exists in our mind. It exists in our friend's joke about how the other friend is fat, which is presumably a justified statement because she or he is obviously skinny and therefore the joke means nothing, right? Wrong. It is never, ever, okay to joke about someone's appearance, or comment on them, without actually knowing everything about them. Let me take a detour and tell you a story. My friend started having problems... halfway through the paper... he made my friends hate themselves, and the hate will continue to spread if the body shaming doesn't stop it. It's just as easy to give someone a compliment as it is to say something mean about their appearance, if not easier. Instead of sarcastically saying "you're so fat," seriously say "you're beautiful" or "I love your body." It's never right to hurt someone. And it's definitely not okay to criticize someone for their appearance, because those words will likely follow them for the rest of their life. As my therapist told me: “Take a look at nature. When we see a rose do we say that the rose would be more beautiful if it were taller or of a different color? No, we don't. We don't do this because nature was created perfect. And since humans are part of nature, we are perfect just the way we are. Help people love themselves for who they are and you will love yourself more.”